Every year, when we pull boxes out of the attic and dust off beloved, old decorations, we return to the touchstone of our traditions. We connect with the stories, rituals and memories of what has shaped us into who we are. These holiday delights of pumpkins, turkeys and carols are the anchors to our own personal comfort and joy. They honor our ancestors and they provide a sense of stability in an ever-changing world.
But the same traditions that are meant to bring happiness can cause unwanted holiday stress. The unchanging nature of tradition can feel rigid and forced in the reality of evolving, present-day life. The phrase, “We’ve always done it this way,” can get in the way of fresh, new traditions that are waiting to be celebrated.
Traditions on Purpose
This year, take a look at your holiday traditions and ask yourself why they are important to you. Really connect with the experience of hosting that party, lighting that tree, or serving that meal. Do you love it or are you merely repeating an old, mindless habit that rolls around once every year? This evaluation is crucial to determine whether or not this tradition is useful for you or something that you can gently leave behind. There are no wrong answers. Authenticity is the goal. When we are mindful of the reason behind our traditions, we celebrate them with an open heart.
Savor the Past
Most of our cherished traditions and rituals involve things that happened in our past. We share happy stories of loved ones no longer at the family table, we eat sugary, kiddie treats and ignore our adult diets for a while, and we sing songs whose lyrics we learned back in school days. Childhood memories are powerful and traditions that involve the childish sense of wonder and magic help keep us young at heart as well.
Tune Traditions to the Present
Traditions were born in the past, but if you want to keep them alive, there’s no time like the present. Look at the way you celebrate and see if your traditions need a breath of fresh air. Do they represent how you live today? Are there ways you can blend the comfort of ritual with the excitement of something new? You may crave Grandma’s old lasagne recipe, but can you serve it alongside a delicious salad you’ve just discovered? Maybe a family hike instead of movies on the couch. Whatever traditions you choose to celebrate, make sure they represent your current values as well as those from your past.
Allow Traditions to Evolve into the Future
Change is an inevitable reality of life, but sometimes it finds resistance in our holiday traditions. Doing things “the same old way” may be our desire, but our lives simply don’t work that way. Every year, whether we want to admit it or not, our lives change. Why not allow our holiday traditions a little breathing room to adapt as well? Instead of gripping to the past, embrace the new reality of the present. New people at the party, new traditions to share, new chances to expand your perspective about what the holidays mean to you. After all, isn’t allowing room for surprises and the unexpected what holiday magic is all about?
However you spend this season, let me be the first to wish you Happy Holidays and may you mindfully select, celebrate and savor your very own traditions.
Ellen Bell a certified Mindfulness Meditation Teacher with a specialty in the practice of positive journaling for wellness. Find out more about Ellen.